War and Peace and a Kinkajou
by DuckHutch
Summary: Despite being in a career where danger is the norm, Shawn Spencer has never taking life, or anything else, seriously. But now he is facing down the fight of his life, and Shawn realizes how far he must go to save the one he loves.    Shules and some whump


In life people will find themselves in all manner of situations. Sometimes a person has the chance to think and plan before they act. At other times they must jump head first and hope lady luck is on their side.

This is a story of a how one of those moments changed the life of Shawn Spencer and the lives of all those around him. Not only was his perception of himself changed in that single moment, but so was his view on all of those in his life.

There is still some debate on whether or not those in his life had a different view of him after this incident.

This, my dear readers, is a story of a moment in which Shawn Spencer had no time to do anything but act on his heart.

He could hear his heart beat in his ears as he ran, and his breath came out in cloudy gasps that evaporated into the frigid December air. The loud popping sound of guns going off around him couldn't even cover up the chilling cries for help from both sides of the fight. The battle had been going on for an hour now, and even the most experienced officers were beginning to show signs of fatigue.

It was no wonder then that Shawn Spencer, Pseudo Psychic Detective Extraordinaire, was beginning to feel as if every one of his limbs wanted to fall off.

Shawn sluggishly ran on, keeping his eyes out for enemy fire. He and Gus had attempted to stay together, but about fifteen minutes before they had gotten tangled up in a large crossfire and had split apart. Since then he had been trying to track down his magic headed friend, but with no luck so far. He cursed inwardly; despite the fact his greatest talent was his ability to notice details he hadn't noticed which way Gus had gone, further increasing the trouble of finding him.

He gasped as a shot nearly hit its mark, and he dived for cover behind a large, industrial garage. He sat still for a moment, trying to calm his breathing. Slowly he stood up, remaining slightly hunched over, and he began to slowly make his way to the other side. He stopped as he reached the edge, and he took a deep breath as he prepared to look around the corner. As he did, a loud crash came from behind, and he spun around with a scream. His scream slowly died as he realized it was just an icicle falling from the gutters. He glared at the broken shards on the ground before turning around and darting off again.

Ten minutes later Shawn caught sight of his wayward friend ducked down behind a large crate. He rushed over and slid in beside him; Shivering, he dropped his gun in his lap and rubbed his half frozen hands together. He grinned at the man crouched down next to him. "How you doing over there, buddy?" he said with shudder.

"I'm fine." Gus said through his heavy breathing. "Where the hell have you been?"

Shawn looked at him indignantly. "I'm good, too. Thanks for asking."

When Gus responded by looking away, Shawn rolled his eyes and continued. "For your information, I've been looking for you. You disappeared during the crossfire."

"_I_ disappeared? You're the one who went the wrong way!"

"Went the wrong way? What, was I supposed to magically know that I was supposed to crawl on my belly towards the south?"

"No, you were supposed to crawl on your belly towards the east. Statistically-"

Shawn groaned and thumped the back of his head against the crate. "Dude, I can't do this with you right now." He sighed and closed his tired eyes. It had been a long day; A _much_ too long day. In fact, it was beginning to feel like he had walked into a Chick Flick drama, or one of those _Lifetime_ movies.

_"I can't do this with you right now."_

He winced, realizing he had heard those exact words earlier in the day.

That morning he had decided to have the "talk" he had been dreading from the moment he had laid eyes on Juliet. He'd known the longer he put it off, the more betrayed she would feel. Unfortunately, six years was a long time to keep his secret from the woman he loved.

More importantly, from the woman who loved him.

She hadn't taken it well.

_Juliet stared at him numbly as he explained every detail. His father's intensive training, his inability to stop himself from calling in those tips, and the situation he had found himself in when Lassiter had accused him of being involved in all of the crimes he had helped solve through those tips. He even went so far as to explain how he had figured out so much about her the first time they met, and how he had solved all 83 cases so far. When he finally finished, he had been talking for over two hours; she hadn't moved a muscle that whole time. She had just stared at him, hardly even blinking, like she had become a statue of the goddess he so often thought she was. "Jules?" he asked hesitantly. As much as he tried to hide it, he could still here the tremble in his voice. "Look, I know I shouldn't even be asking anything of you right now, but please say something."_

_Juliet looked down and breathed in a deep sigh. "Shawn…"She covered her mouth with her hand for a moment before looking back up at him with tears in her eyes. "Shawn, I can't do this with you right now." With that she stood and walked out of the room..._

She'd left his dry-cleaner apartment soon after that. Since then they hadn't spoken a word. Lassiter hadn't shown up with handcuffs and a child-waking-up-on-Christmas-morning grin on his face to arrest him, so that had to be a good sign. But what if he had lost her? What if his lying had cost him the most important person in his life to leave him? The thought made his heart turn to lead in his chest, and he clutched at it painfully.

It took a moment for him to register that Gus was shouting at him. He shook his head and came back to the world, the noise of the violence around him penetrating his brain once again.

"Shawn!"

He glanced back at Gus and saw a look a concern on his face. "What?" he said. He was surprised at how short of breath he was.

"Are you…ok?" Gus said gently.

Shawn opened his mouth to answer, when he felt a drop of water slide down his cheek and fall, hitting his hand. He reached up and touched his face with his fingers. He blinked in surprise, and quickly brushed at his eyes with his sleeve. He was crying. He never cried. The last time he had cried was the night he had run away from home, speeding away from his troubles on his motorcycle.

Shawn shivered and glanced at his confused and worried best friend. "I have to go find Juliet." With that, he made a quick dash for the next crate, and hurried along his allies' side in a desperate search for his girlfriend.

It wasn't long into his search before Shawn began to think about what would happen if Juliet decided to turn him in. Of course it was possible, maybe even probable. After all, he had lied to her for all these years. What creature with a heart wouldn't feel betrayed? Not to mention she was a cop. It was her duty to turn in criminals, and that's what he was: An unusually talented con artist.

Lassiter would be pleased, he was sure. He smiled ruefully when he pictured Lassiter's boyish joy at being allowed to handcuff him and throw him in the cage at last. He'd probably stand around awhile and deliver mocking speeches about how a real psychic would have seen this coming a mile away.

What about Gus? When he'd told everything to Juliet he'd tried to keep from implicating Gus in the scheme, but he was sure she would guess. She knew the two of them well enough to know that there was hardly anything he and his best friend didn't know about each other. If they were able to get evidence that he had known Shawn wasn't a psychic, he'd be thrown in the jail, too. Shawn doubted Gus could handle the slammer for more than a few seconds before he'd begin to panic; and it'd be his fault. Poor Gus…

"Out of the way, Spencer!"

Shawn snapped out of his dark thoughts at the bark of the familiar voice. "Lassie?" he called as the detective shoved past him. Lassiter ignored him, instead diving behind a black sedan.

"Lassie, where's-"

"Get down!" Lassiter reached up and tugged Shawn down beside him by the front of his shirt. He shot him an irritable look. "Are you nuts? You were standing out in the open!" he gave him a once over with narrowed eyes. "Where's your riffle?"

Shawn glanced down at his now empty hands. _I really do have a problem,_ he thought to himself, sighing inwardly. "My kinkajou stole it. They're great to bring in to gun battles, but unfortunately Kkarlton is a trigger happy little guy and wanted to fight on his own."

"Oh, save it, Spencer." He hesitated a moment before turning to Shawn again. "I'm not trigger happy."

Shawn raised his eyebrows. "And Gus has nerves of steel."

Lassiter looked as his he would respond when he seemed to spot something across the street. "Oh, hell. O'Hara! Cover me!" he bellowed as he took off for the other side.

"Right!"

Shawn whirled around, looking for Juliet. It took him a moment, but he spotted her about twenty feet to his left. She was standing behind another car, her eyes and gun trained on a black clad man on the other side. Her face was red from exertion and the cold, and strands of wayward blonde hair were plastered to her face.

God, she was beautiful.

He started to make his way to her when a shadow at her back made him pause. A figure was slowly rising behind her, with a gun aimed and ready to fire. It seemed an enemy had made his way to their side.

And his gun was trained on Shawn's Juliet.

He was half way to her before his brain even registered what he was going to do. His father would be pissed, no doubt, and maybe a little surprised. Gus and Lassie would probably agree it was a little dramatic, although both would admire him for it. Jules…she would understand. And all of them would miss him in their own way. But what choice did he have, he asked himself, to save the woman he loved?

One step later, and he leaped between Juliet and her assailant with all the strength he had left.

He knew it was a hero's sacrifice; an end fit for the likes of Hercules himself. Jules would have a chance to live on and make her dreams come true. She could find someone who would treat her better than he had. Someone…who wouldn't lie to her.

His love would at least have another chance to come out of this alive, and that's what mattered the most.

That didn't mean being shot didn't hurt like hell.

He hit the pavement hard, the momentum from his leap causing him to slide a foot before rolling onto his back. He coughed and closed his eyes, clutching at the red stain on his shirt.

"Shawn!"

He could hear her footsteps as she hurried to his side, and then her face came into view. "Shawn, are you ok?" She asked, gently brushing the hair from his brow.

"Juliet…" Shawn whispered, clutching her other hand tightly in his. "It doesn't look like we're going to have as much time together as we wanted."

"Shawn-"

"No, Jules. Let me finish. It doesn't look like we're going to have as much time together as we wanted, but that doesn't mean you can't still do all the things we planned on doing together…"

"Shawn-"

"Just promise me you'll find someone special to do those things with. It really wouldn't be fun to go to Disney World by yourself."

"Shawn, you're not dying. Stop talking like this."

"Jules, don't lie to me…"

A hint of frustration entered her voice. "Shawn, it's a paintball."

"Jules!" he huffed indignantly. "I was trying to be dramatic! And I was on a roll, too!"

She shook her head, a small smile playing at her lips. "If you haven't noticed, the fight is still going on around us."

"I think it's going to leave a nasty bruise."

"Shawn…" Juliet said, shaking her head in amusement and exasperation. "I'll meet you in the "dead zone" after the game. We can talk then."

Her pointed look told him exactly what they were going to talk about.

The "dead zone" was in one of the larger warehouse buildings on the storage lot. Someone had set up a table in one corner filled with pots of coffee and tea, plus an assortment of muffins, doughnuts, and bagels. Fold out tables and chairs were set up in the center of the room, with slightly more comfortable couches lined up against one wall. Shawn lounged in one of these, nursing a mug of rather bitter decaf in one hand and a half eaten old fashioned in the other.

He wondered if telling Juliet everything had been the right thing to do. Morally right, certainly; Girlfriend wise, though…he wasn't as sure. He'd never been one for "serious" relationships; he'd always been a couple of months at most type, moving from one beautiful girl to the next. Falling in love with many, but never learning to trust one.

At least, he had always thought he loved his girlfriends. But meeting Juliet had changed his whole outlook on dating. Before he met her, physical attraction had always been his main interest. And he had been undoubtedly attracted to her the moment he saw her. But as time had passed, that aspect had lost its importance. The little things about her began to take precedence over her physique; he wanted to know more and more about his little blonde enigma. Who she truly was mattered more to him than any feminine body could. Before he knew it, he was ready and willing to give up his life for her.

He had never been more terrified by anything then this feeling of unquestionable love.

Shawn heard the door creak open, the echoing sound startling in the small, quite space. He looked up as the soft tread of sneakers made their way to him. Juliet stood in front of him, a blue stain on her left side. She smiled, but it seemed tight and tense. "Lassiter thought I was a red team member sneaking up on him."

He nodded. "He's more trigger happy then Kkarlton."

Juliet stood there awkwardly for a minute before finally electing to sit down beside him. They sat tongue tied for another moment, each waiting for the other to speak.

"Shawn-"

"Jules-"

They said at the same time. Both chuckled softly, then Juliet started again.

"How's the bruise?"

"Hurts, but I doubt it'll kill me. It's nothing like being shot by the real thing."

"I'm sure."

Again, silence. Shawn began to wonder how often reconciliations, or break ups, had awkward pauses in them. He was quickly learning to hate them.

Juliet took a deep breath. "Shawn," she looked at him, and to his surprise she was smirking. "Did you really think I wouldn't figure it out?"

Shawn gawked at her. "You…you _knew_? But…how…?"

She shook her head, full out grinning now. "Soon after I met you, I started to realize that key parts of your explanations you'd give us were small things I'd seen, but ignored. I thought they were insignificant. But after awhile I learned to take them in, and then I'd find I was on the same track as you. Although you'd always beat me to the punch. " She added, acknowledging him. "It didn't take me long to realize that your "psychic" revelations were just incredible deductive reasoning powers."

"But, why didn't you ever say anything to me?"

She shrugged. "For the most part, you weren't doing any harm. And you weren't doing anything illegal. You were doing exactly what you were contracted to do: help the SBPD solve difficult cases."

"It's not illegal? So…I can't be arrested?"

"No. It's just ethically questionable."

"What about Gus and my dad?"

"What about them?"

"They can't be arrested either, can they? I mean, they did put me up to it."

Juliet gave him a look. "Shawn, I know very well that isn't true. You'd force Gus into it, and your father would give in and help out to keep you safe."

Shawn didn't try to disagree. He had been joking, but Juliet had hit right on the money.

"Jules…" Shawn ran his hand through his hair nervously. "Look, I know I should have told you sooner-"

"No, Shawn."

He looked up into her face, surprised. "What do you mean, 'no'? I'm trying to apologize."

"I know. But you don't need to." She held up her hand when he opened his mouth. "No, listen. I don't think you could have told me sooner. It was pretty obvious to me from the beginning that you have issues with trust. From what you've told me, it doesn't sound like you've ever had much of a real relationship, except with Abigail. Even then, I could tell you were keeping her at arm's length. The fact that you were willing to tell me, with all that it implied, means more then I can say." She reached out and took his hand. "Thank you."

Of all the things he had expected her to say, "Thank you" was so far down on the list, it was even on there. If there was any better reason out there to show just how amazing Juliet was, he couldn't think of it.

He swallowed hard. "I love you, Jules."

Juliet smiled, and squeezed his hand with a contented sigh. "I love you too, Shawn."

Of all the words in the world, nothing spoke as loud as the love they expressed in their clasped hands. So they sat together in companionable silence for the rest of the game, the chaos around them unregistered as they relaxed in their own silent world.


End file.
